


On Your Mark, Get Set, Baaaaake!

by OhNoMyBreadsticks



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Baking, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Hobbies, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mentioned Hank Anderson, Mentioned Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Mentioned PM700, Mentioned Sumo (Detroit: Become Human), Mentioned Tina Chen, Sorry kiddos, The Great British Bake Off, also Bob Ross is here, catch me out here making paul hollywood jokes, is like an integral part of this fic, warning for language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-07
Updated: 2019-05-07
Packaged: 2020-02-27 11:57:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18738550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OhNoMyBreadsticks/pseuds/OhNoMyBreadsticks
Summary: Nines doesn't see the point of having a hobby, but Connor and Gavin seem certain that he should have one. It shouldn't be that hard to find a hobby though, right? Not for the most advanced prototype Cyberlife has ever created...





	On Your Mark, Get Set, Baaaaake!

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was entirely inspired by the lovely folks over on the Hankcon Valentines Exchange discord <3 They came up with the idea of Nines being really bad at baking and I took the idea and ran with it lol. A lot of this is inspired by my absolute love of GBBO, so like, if you are also a fan of that show please hit me up in the comments!
> 
> As always much love and gratitude to my amazing beta [thislittlekumquat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thislittlekumquat/pseuds/thislittlekumquat) who is so much more than just an editor <3

It all started because Connor was on his brother’s case again about having a “hobby”. After deviating (and hell, even before then), Connor had developed a myriad of different interests. He loved animals (fish and dogs in particular), he loved collecting antique coins, and he loved learning about old human technology. Hank had been helping him explore vinyl records, and there was nothing Connor delighted in more than running his fingers over the grooves of the vinyl and trying to guess what kind of music they contained. Well. Maybe that was a lie. He did love petting Sumo quite a lot.

 

Nines, meanwhile, had found the concept of finding a hobby a much more daunting task. He did enjoy things, but those things mostly revolved around Gavin Reed. He liked figuring out what kinds of things would make Gavin smile, he enjoyed feeling the texture of the skin across the bridge of his nose where his scar rested, and he loved how the heat from Gavin’s hand would seep into his chassis when his boyfriend held his hand in public. Nines had also recently begun to make more friends - he liked talking to the androids at Jericho very much, and he counted Tina and Polly as valued members of his social circle. 

 

But Connor was always on Nines about finding something else to do with his time, and Gavin (the traitor) had agreed with him this time. Something about it not being healthy for Nines to spend all of his time just obsessing over his boyfriend, blah blah blah. Nines, personally, found that accusation to be absurd. He spent a lot of time thinking about work as well. But with both of them insisting, he really didn’t have much of a choice - Connor could be very persistent, and Nines shuddered to think about what his brother could accomplish with the support of his boyfriend. Thank god they usually didn’t agree like this.

 

Nines approached the problem of finding a hobby the way he would any other problem - he collected as much data as possible, analyzed all of the possibilities, and then went about testing them for suitability. Having pared the list down from the thousands of possible hobbies he had found online using simple parameters - legality, feasibility, android compatibility, likelihood of Gavin hating it, etc. - Nines was still left with a sizable amount to test. But a daunting task had never deterred him before (he  _ had _ gotten Gavin Reed to date him, after all), so he began from a random point on the list on his next day off. Finding a hobby could not possibly be too difficult for an advanced RK900 model. Nines was very certain this would not take long at all.

 

Strangely though, the first hobby Nines tried was a bit of a failure. And the next, and the next after that. Every activity had something to it that wasn’t quite  _ right _ , or it was too easy, or it was just...boring. Nines didn’t feel that emotion too often, but it had cropped up during several of his recent attempts at hobbies. Puzzles, for instance. Humans seemed to rave about puzzles, and even some androids found retro puzzles with actual pieces to be relaxing and interesting to complete. But when Nines sat down and spread the ten thousand pieces out on the kitchen table, he found himself putting them together with little more than routine efficiency. There was no mystery to where each piece would fit - his pre-construction software meant that he could easily predict the location of every single piece in less time than it took to pick it up and put it down where it belonged. 

 

Star-gazing was similarly boring for some reason, as Nines looked up through the telescope and identified every star and its corresponding constellation and spatial location. He understood what each star was made of, and how long it would take to burn out, but he felt no emotional response from gazing at them. Plus it was lonely up on the roof of their apartment building, Gavin having refused to join him because  _ Some of us get cold, tin can, no way am I freezing my ass off to look at a bunch of lights in the sky. _ Perhaps humans took comfort in the idea of being alone and yet gazing up at the universe they belonged to. Nines just felt listless.

 

After the first ten or so ideas on Nines’ list turned out to be flops, Gavin finally stepped in with some ideas of his own. Maybe it was out of pity - with each failed attempt at a hobby, he  saw Nines’ LED swirling at yellow for longer and longer periods of time - or maybe because he really didn’t want to have to shell out the cash to rent a pinball machine that wasn’t going to fit comfortably into their apartment. Either way, Nines appreciated the help. Whenever he was floundering at being a person, it was Gavin who set him on the right path, whether he realized it or not.

 

Watching Netflix was something they already did together, and Nines quite enjoyed it. He had attempted to insist that this counted as a hobby he already had, but Gavin brushed that off as just an excuse not to try anything new. Well, he had brushed it off initially, then had to backpedal slightly as Nines pointed out that when they first started watching together, Gavin had very clearly stated that ‘Netflix and chill is like, my favorite couples’ hobby.’ Having the ability to play back sound clips came in handy sometimes, he thought smugly.

 

But it turned out that Netflix also doubled as Gavin’s well of potential hobbies for Nines to try, and not just a good excuse to sit on his boyfriend’s lap. “Seriously, this was all the rage back when I was younger.” He had insisted, setting up an easel for Nines in their kitchen and laying out a bunch of paints. Nines had been very firm about laying down some plastic sheeting when he heard there was paint involved, although he doubted  _ he _ would be making any mess. “You just listen to this chill dude walk you through painting, and you follow along.” Gavin explained enthusiastically, setting his laptop up in view of the canvas and navigating to what must have been one of his favorite episodes. “And I’m sure you’re gonna do great babe, but if you mess up it’s all okay. Cause everything’s just a happy little accident or whatever.” 

 

Nines tried his best not to be nervous as he faced the blank canvas, brush in hand. Painting was somewhat of a cult pastime with androids, given the fact that Markus was so famously a painter. Well, if their fearless leader RK200 could paint, Nines was sure that he, an RK _ 900 _ model, could do it too. He was so caught up in concentrating as he worked that he didn’t have time to enjoy it at all. It was all a matter of watching the movements of the brush onscreen and replicating them perfectly - soothing voiceover be damned. The episode ended and Nines was left with a gorgeous painting, but none of the pleasant emotional feedback he had been led to believe a hobby should provide.

 

“Holy shit babe, you copied it perfectly!” Gavin exclaimed when he saw the finished canvas, his face contorting into gleeful surprise, then rapidly into suspicion. He could tell when his boyfriend wasn’t happy, that was one of the things that had initially so endeared him to Nines - the fact that he was able to read the micro-expressions that made up the extent of Nines’ ability to emote. “What’s wrong?” Gavin asked, approaching to wrap an arm around Nines’ waist and rest his head on his shoulder. Nines huffed out a few warm breaths in frustration as he tried to figure out what was bothering him so much. Often, the wide variety of emotions deviancy had presented him with got all tangled up and he had trouble pinpointing the exact root of the problem.

 

“I cannot understand why finding a hobby is so difficult for me,” Nines finally admitted. “I have been trying so many different things, and yet none of them make me happy.” It was embarrassing, too, to be failing at something that should be so easy to achieve. Everyone seemed to have something they enjoyed doing, even some of the more damaged deviants that had made it through the revolution. 

 

Gavin considered for a few moments before replying, “I mean, it’s not exactly fair, most people don’t go out on purpose trying to find a hobby… Me and Connor may have pushed you a bit too hard.” He let out a sigh of his own, looking up at Nines with those stupidly endearing eyes, adding, “We just wanted you to have fun, not get stressed out. Sorry, babe.”

 

It would have been a crime not to lean down and plant a kiss on the top of Gavin’s head, so that’s what Nines did. He was a police officer, after all. The law was important. Plus he wasn’t sure if he knew what he wanted to say just yet. It worked out though, because Gavin grinned up at him and said, “Wanna just watch Netflix and cuddle on the couch instead?” Nines was more than happy to nod and bundle his boyfriend up in his arms to watch some mindless television together. At least that made him feel something inside, even if it was mostly from the way Gavin idly played with their intertwined hands as he zoned out.

 

About a week later, it turned out that Netflix had actually been the answer to Nines’ hobby conundrum after all, Gavin had just picked the wrong show. Something in Nines just… clicked as they began watching what his boyfriend described as ‘like, the chillest baking show ever.’ Maybe it was the precision necessary for the measuring of ingredients and timing of the bake that had him intrigued. Maybe it was the steely honesty of the male judge as he looked down on the contestants’ bakes and pointed out every flaw. But mostly it was the uncertainty of it all - despite all of the prepwork the contestants completed and all of Nines’ pre-construction software, he still couldn’t accurately predict when a loaf of bread would come out ‘good’ or ‘over-proved’.

 

Gavin noticed the way that Nines began to sit up straighter and pay more attention right away, a sly smile spreading across his face. “You like baking, baby?” he asked, twisting his head from where it rested on Nines’ lap in order to look up at him, “Or do you just have the hots for Paul?” He snickered at his own joke as Nines rolled his eyes, retorting, “He seems more your type than mine. Tall, blue eyes, tendency to be critical…” The snickers died in Gavin’s throat as he scowled, insisting, “I  _ do not _ find that bastard attractive! He’s so annoying and pompous and -- anyways, babe, you’re avoiding the question. Does baking look like something you’d want to try?”

 

Nines wanted to retort that he had not been avoiding the question, but he felt a strange swell of anxiety at the prospect of trying yet another hobby. What if it was just interesting on tv and he was just too perfect at it again? But he screwed his courage up and admitted, “Yes, baking does seem like it could be enjoyable. Do you think that would be alright to try?” 

 

Gavin nodded enthusiastically right away, as supportive as ever at the prospect of his boyfriend doing something he liked. “Hell yeah, we can get some ingredients next time we go grocery shopping. Start with something easy, like cookies,” he said, and Nines couldn’t help but smile along.

 

That was how they found themselves standing in their kitchen with ingredients organized in neat rows on the counter. Gavin was complaining about his apron being annoying, but Nines had insisted. “Gavin, I’m not going to stain treat everything you’re wearing, so the apron stays,” he said firmly, but the upward tilt of his lips betrayed how cute he found the image of his boyfriend in an apron. Gavin grumbled but didn’t try to fight it, putting his hands up in mock surrender. “I’m not even going to be doing any baking, I’m just here to supervise and eat the dough when you’re not looking,” he said with a chuckle, ignoring the exasperated expression Nines got at the mention of eating raw cookie dough. “You got the recipe ready, babe?”

 

Knowing this wasn’t behavior he was likely to dissuade Gavin from, Nines simply nodded, holding up the carefully printed sheet. “Yes, I have the instructions right here,” he confirmed. “I think I’m ready to start.” The first step was simply assembling all of the dry ingredients, something which Nines found laughably easy already. He simply had to use the measuring cups… Oh, this wouldn’t do. These measuring cups were slightly off in their measurement size. They wouldn’t measure accurately, and if that happened, his cookies would be the wrong consistency. Rolling up his sleeves thoughtfully, Nines calmly plunged his hand into the bag of flour - he would simply measure the ingredients by weight using his advanced sensors.

 

The yelp of surprise from Gavin startled Nines almost more than the cloud of flour that billowed up from the bag and instantly coated the front of his shirt and his apron. “Oh my god, babe, what are you doing??” Gavin gasped out, biting back the urge to laugh as Nines blinked in total surprise at the mess in front of him. 

 

“The measuring cups…. are not accurate. I was going to measure it myself…” He muttered, still trying to figure out where he had gone wrong. “Psh. That small of a difference won’t matter. You can’t just go around fisting the flour, tin can,” Gavin teased, approaching Nines and dusting him off to break him out of his stupor even though it got flour all over him as well. 

 

“Here, seriously. Just use the cups,” Gavin insisted, pressing them into Nines’ hand. Muttering about inaccuracy the whole way, Nines measured out the flour without getting more all over himself. Satisfied, Gavin relaxed and turned away to try and dust his hands off in the sink, leaving the android to finish measuring out the salt and baking soda before setting aside the dry ingredients. The butter and sugar made it into the mixing bowl without incident as well, and Nines felt a bit of his confidence returning. This wasn’t so hard. All he had to do now was turn on the stand mixer (Nines had insisted that he could mix just as quickly and efficiently by hand, but Gavin had said they had do it the ‘normal people’ way) and get the butter and sugar all fluffy. Inspecting the numbers on the mixer and pre-constructing the speed at which each one would cause the beaters to spin, he settled on the fourth setting, flipping the switch over to it and looking down to watch it get to work.

 

The stand mixer roared to life at its higher setting, bits of butter and sugar splattering out of the bowl before Nines could properly react. Frantically, he grabbed the mixer and turned it off, LED cycling a stressful yellow. “Are you sure this mixer is still functional Gavin??” he snapped, eyeing the offending machine as if it were likely to suddenly deviate and announce its plans to get up and walk out the door. Gavin, who had once again nearly jumped out of his skin, loosened his death grip on the kitchen counter and wheezed out, “Nines you can’t just… you can’t just turn the mixer onto the high settings right away! You gotta ease into it, holy shit.” Walking over to the bowl, he scraped the butter back down and showed Nines how to slowly move the mixer from the lowest setting up to the highest, so that the ingredients had a chance to combine and not just fly out of the bowl.

 

Maybe it was the built-up stress from the flour  _ and _ the mixer, but by the time Nines had to get the eggs to mix them into the butter his LED was a solid yellow and his calculations were off. There was no other explanation for why when he went to crack the egg gently against the side of the bowl, the shell practically exploded in his hand, slimy egg dripping off his fingers and onto the counter. Seeing the wild swirl of yellow and the dangerous set to Nines’ jaw, Gavin wisely shut his mouth, simply pushing the rest of the eggs across the counter towards him with a little encouraging nod. It took the sacrifice of four more eggs before two of them ended up mostly in the bowl, Nines washing a frankly shocking amount of eggshell down the drain as he tried not to give in to the sheer annoyance rising up his throat. Behind him, Gavin saw his opportunity and darted a hand into the bowl, sticking it into his mouth with a smug grin.

 

A smug grin which instantly transformed into a look of disgust as Gavin exclaimed, “Holy fuck! Salty!!” Glaring, chassis creaking under the pressure of his jaw clenched shut, Nines stalked over and stuck his own finger into the bowl, bringing it to his lips for analysis. The salt content flashed across his vision, and suddenly he was horrifyingly aware of the fact that white sugar and salt did, on the surface level, look identical. Nines felt an odd pressure rising in his chest as he stared down at the bowl of dough, a feeling that rose and bloomed until he was suddenly overcome with shame. Hand dropping to his side, Nines turned on his heel and beat a hasty retreat out of the kitchen, unable to bear the thought of Gavin looking at him right now.

 

_ What’s wrong with me? _ Repeated over and over in Nines’ processors, footage of every disastrous choice he had made in the kitchen replaying with regrettable clarity. He was an advanced model, he never made mistakes like this! Let alone at a fucking  _ hobby _ , something humans did for fun! Ignoring the fact that he was covered in flour and dirtying the duvet cover, Nines flopped down on the bed, hands curling and uncurling in his lap. Maybe he should have just stuck with one of the boring hobbies, at least he was good at those…

 

Too preoccupied with his own little crisis, Nines missed Gavin entering the room quietly, only looking up in surprise when warm hands enveloped his own. “Hey,” Gavin said softly, a small smile curving up the corners of his mouth despite the worried frown creasing his eyebrows together. Usually, Nines would run his fingers over the divot in the skin that frown created, telling Gavin it looked cute on him. But now, he simply averted his eyes, commenting dully, “I’ll go and clean up the kitchen in a moment.” 

 

That got a head shake out of Gavin, as his hands squeezed his boyfriend’s. “Babe, you can’t clean up yet. We haven’t finished our cookies,” he said, voice soft but still confident.

 

“The dough is ruined. I messed up every possible thing I could have,” Nines muttered, still refusing to meet Gavin’s gaze. That got a chuckle out of the man, and Nines finally looked down with an affronted frown. “Are you making fun of me?” he snapped, hurt clear in his tone and the way he attempted to pull his hands away. 

 

“No, no, of course not,” Gavin reassured him, “It’s just...you didn’t even fuck up that bad. Sure, you messed up along the way, but everyone does the first time they bake.” Nines opened his mouth to protest, then shut it slowly as hours of footage from the baking show flitted across his memory. They did mess up quite a bit…

 

“You’re just not used to being not perfect at shit,” Gavin continued, a small smile growing across his face as his confidence rose, “But look, that’s basically what a hobby is - something you enjoy fucking up at ‘till you’re good at it.” 

 

Nines gave his boyfriend A Look, saying, “I don’t think that’s really the definition…” but was cut off by Gavin lifting their clasped hands to his lips to kiss them. “Anyways, I think you should give it another shot with me as some added help, cause then I’ll actually get to eat some cookies,” he finished his argument, and Nines couldn’t find it in his programming to deny him. 

 

Slowly, Nines nodded his head and allowed Gavin to pull him to his feet. 

 

He followed Gavin quietly into the kitchen, and stood aside as the offending dough was thrown away and the remaining ingredients were pulled together. 

 

He allowed Gavin to hand him a measuring cup and the flour, and even managed to get all the flour in the bowl without spilling any more. 

 

He felt a tiny smile began to fight its way onto his face as Gavin dramatically raised each egg with a flourish before he expertly cracked them on the bowl. 

 

By the time the batter was churning away in the mixer, Nines had to admit that somehow, all of the upset and annoyance from earlier had completely dissolved, leaving him smiling and chuckling at his boyfriend’s antics and the excitement of getting to place the dough onto the cookie sheets. Gavin deferred to his better judgement when it came to measuring out the portions for each cookie, and Nines couldn’t deny the little surge of pride he felt when the dough balls were lined up neatly on the baking paper. Gavin popped the tray into the oven and turned to give his boyfriend a victorious smile.

 

“Now all we have to do is wait! See babe, you did fine the second time around,” Gavin said, leaning against the counter despite it being still coated in flour and sugar. He had a piece of butter from the mixer somehow stuck on his cheek, probably from when he was peering in as it mixed. Nines leaned forward and kissed it off his skin, the oil melting in his mouth and exploding in a flash of chemical compound data. 

 

“ _ We _ did good,” he corrected his boyfriend with a smile, enjoying the way a soft flush rose on his cheeks from the unexpected kiss. “Thank you… For helping me.”

 

Gavin waved a hand dismissively before reaching out to tug Nines closer by the apron. “I think I’ve changed my mind,” he admitted, “Maybe we could do this hobby together. At least for a little while, ‘till you find your feet.” 

 

The way his eyes flicked up to meet Nines’ to gauge his reaction was adorable, and Nines felt his LED cycling furiously as he recorded and catalogued every inch of Gavin’s face. “Oh so now you get to change the rules, hm?” he teased, wrapping his arms around the smaller man. “Seems like cheating.” 

 

Before Gavin could retort, Nines leaned down and pressed their foreheads together, smiling softly. “I think I would like that very much. Who says hobbies can’t be shared?” Gavin chuckled and replied, “Probably that shitty judge, but who cares what he says, hm?” As the two of them shook with laughter and the smell of cookies began to filter through the kitchen, Nines had to admit that maybe Connor had been right about this whole hobby business.

 

Not that he’d ever tell him.

**Author's Note:**

> Obligatory reminder that should I ever meet Dabid Cabbage I would visit the wrath of Paul Hollywood upon him!
> 
> Thank you for reading, your time and support mean so much to this happy little gremlin <3 I hope you enjoyed this fluffy fluffy little piece, I certainly enjoyed writing it!!


End file.
